I've never prayed for God to make Brody's Autism go away. I've prayed for peace, patience, understanding, perseverance, opportunities for more time to work with Brody, and knowledge for myself and my husband. I've prayed for Brody to learn the love of friendship, to experience the gifts of imagination and pretend play (God answered that prayer, by the way), to be accepted and accept others, to learn social graces and appropriate social cues, to gain motor skills that he can participate in sports at the level of his peers.
Why don't I pray for complete healing? Because there are aspects of a ASD that are true gifts. Brody has an amazing memory. He can figure out how just about anything works. He has an acute curiosity about the world around him and a desire to learn everything. He loves to read, play boardgames, and practice math, sight words, and science with flashcards. Most things academic come easy to Brody and he enjoys participating in it. He's four and while with ASD comes some ADHD behaviors, he will sit with flashcards and puzzles for a long time unlike most kids his age. Why would I want to pray that away? These are Brody's gifts.
I love this quote from Temple Grandin:
"What would happen if the autism gene was eliminated from the gene pool?
You would have a bunch of people standing around in a cave, chatting and socializing and not getting anything done."
— Temple Grandin (The Way I See It: A Personal Look at Autism and Asperger's)
While Brody has some challenges that other children do not, he also has many gifts. I thank God for every aspect of Brody, everyday, and I pray that he will hone his gifts while gaining the skills necessary to succeed and flourish in his beautiful life.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Sunday, June 26, 2011
The Power of Knowledge and the Power of Prayer
Life with my son, Brody,has been a series of obstacles, ordeals, joys, laughs, heartbreaks, and sighs of relief, in no particular order.
After surviving a shakey beginning, a threatened miscarriage then a failure to thrive newborn; he was a chubby, thriving infant who giggled and played and was a pretty decent eater.
Then at about 14 months his decision to quit eating anything but PB & J or grilled cheese sandwiches made for a child that had a weaker immune system than most. He was constantly sick.
At age two, my husband and I realized that his verbal skills seemed behind. We had him evaluated to learn that not only was he behind verbally, but his gross motor skills were delayed. While they did not officially give him a diagnosis, they used the term Sensory Integration Disorder. We went to work with speech, eating and occupational therapies. He began preschool two mornings a week and his teacher integrated many methods prescribed by his therapists into classroom activities. He responded very well to school, speech and OT....but not so much to trying new foods.
At age three he tested out of state provided early intervention for both speech and OT. We thought we were in the clear, then three months later my husband and I noticed that Brody's speech was rapidly regressing, and his sensory seeking behaviors (head butting, slamming himself into walls, throwing things) became severe. We had him tested by our local public school system's early intervention services and they said he was fine. We knew they were wrong, so we took him to a private speech therapist. His evaluations showed he was 9 months behind in articulation and 1 year ahead in language. However his language usage had "cracks" according to the therapist. He had the vocabulary, yet his receptive language was repetitive and his expressive language was convoluted and unusual.
He began full day preschool and it was quickly apparent that he was not on the same social level as the other children. He never played WITH the other children, just beside or behind them, but mostly by himself. He could not make himself play imaginary games he couldn't understand the concept of pretending. When he played with trains or cars he would reenact stories he had read or seen on TV. He had difficulty sitting in circle time, and could never keep his hands to himself.
My heart broke one day when I was watching him through the window of the school gym, he was standing against the wall spinning a door stopper while the other kids were playing with balls and trikes. He was told to go play and he had no idea what to do, so he picked up a ball and threw it at another kid who wasn't even looking at Brody. I knew at that moment we had to take action.
At his fourth birthday his speech therapist referred him out of speech and back into OT with the intent that any remaining speech delay was related to motor planning which would be addressed in OT. My husband met with Brody's pediatrician who shared our concerns and referred us to a Pediatric Psychologist for testing.
While waiting for his test results Brody and I met with his new Occupational Therapist. She amazed me. She explained him like no one ever had, she described how his brain works, where the gaps existed and how we could work together to fill those gaps. I left so excited and motivated!
A couple weeks later my husband and I sat in the psychologist's office as she handed us 20 pages of test results. Everything she said in that hour is mostly a fog. I mostly remember reading the word...Autism. We always had our suspicions, our close family members did as well, but to see it on a piece of paper next to your child's name is devastating.
We cried a lot that day; then went to work for our son. I called and emailed select friends and family asking them to pray for us. We bought books, met with teachers, and consulted therapists.
After research and consultations we believe Brody has a combination of Motor Coordination Dysfunction and Aspergers.
Its been three months since we got his diagnosis, and while there have been small victories and defeats throughout this process I have never seen such a dramatic change as I have in the last week.
My little boy has started pretending, out of the blue! He gets his cars and trains and asks his dad or me to pretend with him. He's making up dialogue and stories! Watching a little boy who would cry and throw a tantrum when we pretended now play imaginary games on his own has us in absolute awe.
While we know we still have challenges ahead, God is good. He heard our prayers and saw the efforts and energy we put into our son's development. In return he gave us some hope...Brody's imagination.
After surviving a shakey beginning, a threatened miscarriage then a failure to thrive newborn; he was a chubby, thriving infant who giggled and played and was a pretty decent eater.
Then at about 14 months his decision to quit eating anything but PB & J or grilled cheese sandwiches made for a child that had a weaker immune system than most. He was constantly sick.
At age two, my husband and I realized that his verbal skills seemed behind. We had him evaluated to learn that not only was he behind verbally, but his gross motor skills were delayed. While they did not officially give him a diagnosis, they used the term Sensory Integration Disorder. We went to work with speech, eating and occupational therapies. He began preschool two mornings a week and his teacher integrated many methods prescribed by his therapists into classroom activities. He responded very well to school, speech and OT....but not so much to trying new foods.
At age three he tested out of state provided early intervention for both speech and OT. We thought we were in the clear, then three months later my husband and I noticed that Brody's speech was rapidly regressing, and his sensory seeking behaviors (head butting, slamming himself into walls, throwing things) became severe. We had him tested by our local public school system's early intervention services and they said he was fine. We knew they were wrong, so we took him to a private speech therapist. His evaluations showed he was 9 months behind in articulation and 1 year ahead in language. However his language usage had "cracks" according to the therapist. He had the vocabulary, yet his receptive language was repetitive and his expressive language was convoluted and unusual.
He began full day preschool and it was quickly apparent that he was not on the same social level as the other children. He never played WITH the other children, just beside or behind them, but mostly by himself. He could not make himself play imaginary games he couldn't understand the concept of pretending. When he played with trains or cars he would reenact stories he had read or seen on TV. He had difficulty sitting in circle time, and could never keep his hands to himself.
My heart broke one day when I was watching him through the window of the school gym, he was standing against the wall spinning a door stopper while the other kids were playing with balls and trikes. He was told to go play and he had no idea what to do, so he picked up a ball and threw it at another kid who wasn't even looking at Brody. I knew at that moment we had to take action.
At his fourth birthday his speech therapist referred him out of speech and back into OT with the intent that any remaining speech delay was related to motor planning which would be addressed in OT. My husband met with Brody's pediatrician who shared our concerns and referred us to a Pediatric Psychologist for testing.
While waiting for his test results Brody and I met with his new Occupational Therapist. She amazed me. She explained him like no one ever had, she described how his brain works, where the gaps existed and how we could work together to fill those gaps. I left so excited and motivated!
A couple weeks later my husband and I sat in the psychologist's office as she handed us 20 pages of test results. Everything she said in that hour is mostly a fog. I mostly remember reading the word...Autism. We always had our suspicions, our close family members did as well, but to see it on a piece of paper next to your child's name is devastating.
We cried a lot that day; then went to work for our son. I called and emailed select friends and family asking them to pray for us. We bought books, met with teachers, and consulted therapists.
After research and consultations we believe Brody has a combination of Motor Coordination Dysfunction and Aspergers.
Its been three months since we got his diagnosis, and while there have been small victories and defeats throughout this process I have never seen such a dramatic change as I have in the last week.
My little boy has started pretending, out of the blue! He gets his cars and trains and asks his dad or me to pretend with him. He's making up dialogue and stories! Watching a little boy who would cry and throw a tantrum when we pretended now play imaginary games on his own has us in absolute awe.
While we know we still have challenges ahead, God is good. He heard our prayers and saw the efforts and energy we put into our son's development. In return he gave us some hope...Brody's imagination.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)